mistakes as a ‘werd’




So, I explained Wide Eyed Stupidity in one of those videos

But not enough

This is Law in Brookeland

First! I should explain the violation classes

Felony Class Violations

Will be first

I started that channel. Now I am starting High Treason


In the process of learning things

Which is something that happens in our brains in every single moment

Every moment, our brains are changing

Taking neurons from tasks that have not been used much lately

And allocating them to the ones we’ve been using more

And, when we learn new things

Making mistakes is part of the process

Of learning

I talked about this somewhere in neuroplasticity

And I will go into more detail on that as time goes by


But I don’t know about you guys

I just have never been the kind of person who has been able to do anything the first try, without making mistakes

This is ‘mistakes’ in a sense that is lacking the negative connotation we generally apply to it

So, the werd mistakes, and not the word

It’s just how we learn, how we grow

And for some of you

It might be helpful, maybe- for me to tell you that I have broadened this mental categorization

To include the kind of learning that is part of personal growth

When we learn, we make mistakes

As we’re getting better

It means that we are getting better


Not that we are failing somehow – it actually means the opposite

So, you see – I’m tying to be more conscious about my word choices

Even using the word stupidity in this kind of context

Is probably leading to unintentional negative connotations, deep in my subconscious

And maybe giving others an inaccurate impression of the kind of feeling I have in my head regarding the things we call mistakes

Which are no longer really mistakes, in my mind


I realized this last night

In a conversation with one of my friends

He used words like ‘unfortunately’ a few times

In the context of the world at large, and the people within it

And I would call him out on it

And say that I felt like it was not ‘unfortunate’

It just is

And with that characterization

I feel like we can most effectively plan ways to get from what is to what we want the world to be like


Words like ‘unfortunately’ are so concrete

They are Life Sentences in the context of punishment

By describing things in such ways

We make reality so,

In our minds

But it does not need to be so


We are the ones attributing the emotional context to the world around us

And we can change that emotional context

But only if we start with the fundamentals of the feels

The feelings that I have in response to things

Have changed

over time

as a result of working towards a more honest dialogue, within my own head


Without judgment

Without blame


Starting from an awareness and acceptance of the way I’m feeling, right now

And making a conscious decision to keep feeling that way

Or not

then finding ways that actually help or hinder that process

That is usually through music, for me, right now

Though I believe there are many, many ways different people can go in and manually turn this emotional knob


I have found, over the past few days, that I am able to best capture the kind of feeling I want to within this server, if I am feeling inspired, as I write

And I’m not quite feeling it yet

So I’m going to switch the music

Start walking, to get the blood a’pumpin’

And maybe I will be able to manufacture that feeling, in the way that I talked about maybe in #empathy


That is not manufacturing at all

But something else


One of the things that happened this morning

That threatened to put me off-kilter

Was that my purse had disappeared

It had been on the porch

My debit cards and ID were on the ground

So I knew it was not a human thief responsible for its disappearance

I knew it was a canine thief


The neighbor’s dog, who is a big bundle of love



I filmed that last night

I thought maybe, when I first met her, that she was underfed

I can hear the humans whom she lives with – yelling at her

From several houses down sometimes

And she is very skittish

But, I think now

That maybe she is just really sensitive

Because she has so much love in her

She is hungry, all the time

Because that kind of #love

Is a highly energetic way of living, which means it results in a super active metabolism!

So she scrounges, when she comes over


And I knew this

So I cleared off what I thought might smell like food from the table on the porch

But I didn’t think my fish purse would. (Heh)

Anyway, I almost didn’t go for a walk outside our property

Because, I’m embarrassed to say, I slept in the dress I was wearing yesterday

And I haven’t showered yet, so I’m still wearing it

And didn’t want any neighbors to see me

But I walked anyway, because I knew I would be more likely to write the way I wanted to, if I did – and that the potential feeling of not getting out what I wanted to say, because I was embarrassed about wearing clothes I wore yesterday that no one was likely even going to notice, and wouldn’t have been that big of a deal anyway – would have made me feel worse than mildly embarrassed

And as I turned the corner from my driveway

There was my purse

In the middle of the street



This is how I go about #fabricating-fortune

By keeping an awareness of what’s really important to me

And being relentless in following through

Being relentless in doing what feels right



Problems are resolved in this way, before they become problems

Of the disastrous sort


By fostering connections, so people like metavore can step in, like he just did in #general

And help me fix things by teaching me,

Before I’ve gone so far in an erroneous path that I have to do even more work later to try to clean up my own messes

You know how that makes me feel?

You know.

don’t stop popthatpopthatpopthat


I spent three years living on the street in Los Angeles. I came out of that, changed. This is my story.

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